What is Love?

What is love? That is the question I would truly like to find the answer to.

I am sure the question I am searching for an explanation to sounds childish, but currently in a state where you see everyone holding hands one minute, breaking up the next, and going back at it for more, is something everyone wants to get their hands on and figure out.

I don't quite understand why love often fulfills us, yet   breaks us in every which way.

Have you ever heard of the saying, "Love Kills Slowly?"
I am trying to figure it out. Does it mean that we love until we die? If that is the case, then it must be true because seriously, life right now is living very slowly.

A quick understanding of my thoughts about this topic, is that love itself is very corrupt. We go back and forth about love and murder. We have no voice between our own feelings. This is such a hard thing to talk about because really, we don't know how to pick a side between love and well, not love! Think about that one. We cannot even choose our own when it comes love and death. I just don't understand why love is so corrupt.

I think that we all need to be alone for a long, long time. We need to be able to be ourselves before going on and making it "both of us."

I understand that it is hard. That lust is so tempting and we want to feel complete. We do not want to feel alone. Love is all about holding hands and not ever letting go forever.

Really people? Really? Get a hold of yourselves! The only way something really gets done is if we truly do it ourselves. We do not need that huge rock in the way to make us be late or annoy us. Seriously, I thought you wanted me to go along with wanting something that is not as good as chocolate. Phew...

You almost had me going there for a second.

Anyways, love is stupid. There, I said it, and I will say it again, LOVE IS STUPID. No joke. We don't even know what it is about and we think we own the whole world already. Goodness gracious. Get real!

If only we really knew that love was, what really slows us down. It steals us. It controls our feelings, gets us overwhelmed and thinks it can get the better of us. Love makes us happy right? Nope, you're wrong. Sorry, play again! It drags us around and gets the better of us. Figure it out people. I have!

The only love I can get overwhelmed with is the love of my marvelous Father, Jesus. He is the love I am always bragging over. His love is the only one that can truly satisfy me and make me happy. I cannot do anything without him or his love.

 Jesus is the only love I can stand to live for. I make every moment of the day to dwell in it too.

Feeling his overflowing abundance is amazing and wonderful in every which way.

I encourage you to pray and receive his wonderful, rich blessing. It is truly amazing!

Obviously, the answer to the question is, Jesus! No hesitation about that!

Hurricane and My Testimony

I have been thinking about hurricane Sandy a little bit lately from watching the news and such. Everyone has been getting riled up over the whole thing, and for me, I'm sorry to say this, but I don't really care for anyone getting effected by the storm. Again, I'm sorry and I know it's very rude and disrespectful.

I have just this past weekend, gotten back on track with my walk with Christ. It has been great so far, but I have a long, long road ahead of me.  My journey has actually begun finally and I am happy that I have a major burden taken off my back. My sin and temptations had been weighing me down and I'm so glad that the chains were taken off. (Literally, I felt them come off!) Jesus can do great things.

For a while, actually a long time, I have been tempted and tried. Breaking free was what I had planned on doing so many  times. Every time I considered that option, I failed. Before I go to bed each night, I usually pray. (Sometimes I forget though.) I would ask Jesus to forgive me of my sins. Every night, I would ask him to forgive me, yet everyday, I would continue with the sin. I felt that Jesus was hurting so much, and then some days I felt I would not go to heaven. I thought God wouldn't accept me anymore for doing such a rebellious act. The most worst feeling I eventually came down to was that God did not love me anymore.

Truth be told, the devil had grabbed me, and had taken a hold of me, and for the longest time, I was letting him drag me around. On most Wednesday nights, during youth group, Pastor Walls would hit every point in my life that I needed to get a hold of and straighten with the love and kindness of my Father, Jesus. He would talk about getting rid of that last part that was still there inside that needed to be forgotten about because Jesus would forgive. I would always say to myself that I would eventually stop, but that was always the devil saying,"You will never stop, it's not that bad." My sin didn't feel that bad at all, until one day while I was in the midst of the devil's rays, I felt weak and that I could not continue doing this retched act.

It was the next day, after I felt that weak spirit set inside me, that I was at church on Sunday and Pastor Mark for once preached on something I could understand. He hit me with his words. Those words God placed inside of his message to let me hear and take into consideration. He said that whatever you have done wrong, whatever your current state, God will still love you. I asked for forgiveness from the father and quit doing my act that had caused false hurts against my will. I prayed to God, with tears in my eyes, sitting with my head in my hands at church, "God, you were always there for me, following me, ready to take me in your arms and restore me from such devious deeds. You loved me."

It's such an awesome feeling to know that God had forgiven me and he still loved me after everything I had just done. Right now, I am currently reading my Bible daily and thanking God for his constant care. Oh, how I love him!

Now, after you had read the first paragraph of this post, you were most likely thinking I was stupid because if I am a Christian, then why am I not caring for the people effected by the storm, right? Well, here's why: I was thinking of the hurricane this morning, and I was thinking to myself, God does everything for a reason. He is the one who had created the heavens and the earth and he is the one who had created this hurricane Sandy. My thoughts were that he was killing people and bringing those who were followers, to heaven. But that didn't seem accurate. Then it had hit me! God is pouring his love all over those people. I think God was telling me this, that he doesn't just create storms for grief and fear, but for all of his love and power to spread unto everyone, including the lost and those who already are one of his. Why worry, when we have his humble grace? Why worry when we have him? Why worry when he is reaching out and sharing his love?

Just like me , when I was surrounded my my storm of sin, he was there for me, spreading his arms out wide and capturing me in his love.It's just like a hurricane, capturing everything it can under water. He is there wanting to love, not to send fear or grief. I thought of this song as it fit perfect in the moment:

Oh and just to let all of you know, prayer can change a life, and God can help you through the storm.

Why worry, when he loves? P.S. God promised to never flood the earth again!

Stupid Things Make Me Laugh!

Okay, so I am maybe not the only one who thinks that perverted and stupid things make me laugh. (Maybe, I probably am the only one!) Here is a picture titled, " Drunk Octopus Wants to Fight You." What didn't make me want to laugh about that? Huh? You tell me!

My English Teacher in school has that picture up on the background of his computer, and dude, did I think it was hilarious! I am a quiet, shy person at school so I didn't bring out the quail in me to start to get up and laugh!

Usually when I am at home, and there is something stupid or perverted, I laugh out loud ('lol,' for those of you who text out there)  and sometimes I get everyone annoyed. (Not normally sometimes, usually all the time.) I can't stop laughing at some moments either.

Anyway, to all you people out there that will maybe laugh, or maybe think this octopus picture is the stupidest thing ever, I dedicate the picture to you!

Surreal Quote

"Beautiful as the chance meeting on a dissecting table of a sewing machine and and umbrella."

I do not quite remember the author of this fabulous quote in which I find amazingly beautiful itself, but I do know that any artist whether they write or make the surreal piece of artwork amazing like this quote really do have large imaginations.

We are currently doing a surreal art unit in my art class at school and I have actually come to find it interesting. I will now, whenever I see something artistic, I look closely and think to myself whether it's surreal or not, same with text and such. I think I am almost becoming obsessed! Well, maybe not.

Surreal art is like dream like art or sometimes I come to think of it as a collage. Here are a couple of examples below of surreal art that I enjoy a lot.  

Surrealism: The art is of something, an idea, but it is created with uses of another source or idea. (That is my thought about Surreal Art! These are two of my favorite pieces of surrealism by my favorite surreal artist Vladimir Kush!

Hot Chocolate!

So, currently I have been living off of hot chocolate. It has been chily outside lately so I guess it makes sense. Let me tell you, three weeks and you'll get addicted, if you are me! I have to have a nice warm cup when I wake up in the morning and one for dinner. Sometimes, I even make myself another cup before I go to bed.

I am not patient, so when I am thirsty or in need of something to eat, I have to think of something that I can make that is easy and wont take too long. Oh, I almost forgot, it has to taste really good as well!

Hot chocolate is okay out of the little packets you buy in a box at the store, but I like to make sure it's me making the delicious, three second drink. For me that is, purchasing those bucket things full of the mix. (I don't actually know what they are called, but they are sure not buckets!) I like taking spoonfuls of the hot chocolate mix. So much fun! I take just three spoonfuls of the mix and put it at the bottom of the mug. I turn the hot water on for the kitchen sink. For me, I always burn myself with hot chocolate if it is blasted hot. So, I make sure I wait a minute until the sink gets hot enough where there is steam coming from the faucet. It usually takes a minute or two for it to do that. Then I place my mug under the faucet with the mix at the bottom and shut the water off when it reaches the top. I take a spoon and mix it around. The water is just right, not too hot, not too cold. Warm, but not luke-warm. Perfect!

This is so easy that I fell in love with this toasty beverage after I was done with a mug. :)